Things I Would Have Never Learned Had I Had Daughters Instead of Sons:

1. With enough practice to send his mother to the funny farm, a boy can learn to burp the alphabet.

2. Taking apart small household appliances is going to be an Olympic sport

3. How fast my car can go, should I ever need to top it out

4. You can catapult items from your salad across the kitchen with a plastic fork, or really most any utensil.

5. Boys dance but they call it wrestling

6. Boys love to hug but they call it wrestling

7. Boys can’t stand in line without sparring but I call it wrestling.

8. Anything and I mean ANYTHING can be a competition.

9. You can be that heavily armed and still walk.

10. A broom handle used for jousting can go all the way through the guest bath door without anyone knowing who did it.

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